Getting Married vs. Staying Married
After sitting with a couple married 20 years on the same day I had to see a newly engaged couple, I figured out most premarital counseling is an assessment that does not give couples marital skill. Developing marital skill gives you patience and the ability to turn towards each other instead of turning away in difficult moments.
I want to help equip you for marriage. While I can provide you with a SYMBIS or Prepare Enrich marital assessment, I can also teach you marital communication skills I typically give my conflict couples. In addition, I can cover sex more thoroughly as a counselor who supports clients with integrated sex and couple therapy.
Pre-marital counseling is associated with lower divorce rates, lower relationship conflict, and higher quality in your relationship (Carlson et al., 2012). Working with a therapist, you can discuss expectations with your partner that will help better prepare both of you for marriage.
So if these sound like you:
- You experience arguments that don’t get resolved
- One of you always compromises to keep the peace
- There is a concern about the finances
- Fears about less sex or affection after marriage
- Need to learn how to resolve/manage conflict
- Are there religious or cultural differences?
- Are there financial differences?
- Are the marital roles and expectations defined?
Pre-marital counseling can be a great benefit to you as a couple.
The intimate nature of marriage requires that you talk to your partner about everything, no matter how awkward or uncomfortable. Pre-marital counseling will help you learn how to be a better listener, and how to make your voice and needs heard in a productive and positive manner.
Pre-marital counseling will also show you how to handle conflict in your marriage. When you live with someone, you will have arguments ranging from mundane to serious issues. How you argue will be a part of the story of how you are as a couple. Learn how to de-escalate arguments and fight fairly so you don’t cause emotional pain from things you said you’d never be able to take back.
In pre-marital counseling, we will likely bring up topics that you’ve previously discussed with your partner and subjects you hadn’t considered before. This fresh perspective from an objective third party will uncover new details from your partner. This is also an excellent time for us to find unexpected areas where you disagree, and give you the tools to handle possible future conflicts.
Getting married is one of life’s most treasured experiences. Pre-marital counseling can help you and your partner turn that momentous occasion into a loving, lasting relationship. Please contact me today to schedule an appointment for guidance and support to strengthen your future marriage.